Evolutionary Blog

A few weeks back I led an event titled The Myth of Self-Sabotage. If you were unable to attend, or if you came and just wanted the Clift Notes on it to remind yourself, or if you missed it entirely, here is a screen-cast for you.

It is 19 minutes and 30 seconds long. May you find it useful and valuable in your life.

Learn how to facilitate this process with your clients at Getting To Grace -- the weekend training November 15th, 16th, and 17th in San Francisco. Details here:  http://getting2grace.com


If you need the iPad version, your video is »HERE«

Recently, I offered a free evening workshop on relationships. Both dating as well as conflict resolution. But the truth is, these distinctions are useful tools in any kind of relationship--be it professional, romantic, personal, or ... well, any relationship. I could have really recorded several versions of this -- or even broke this one out into three and flesh the ideas, tools, and concepts even further, but consider this a dense yet brief overview of a 2-hour workshop.

Watch the video below for more. And rememer to imagine other applications in addition to the situations I mention.

Want an iPad version?  Your video is »here« . Want to watch it on the iPhone?  Click »here«. On most other devices, the HTML5 video below should do just fine.

Approximate run-time is 31 minutes.

Dating. Relationships. Conflict.

We’ve all dated. Most of us wish we did not have to.  

And we’ve all been in relationships of varying length and experienced some kind of conflict. And we’ve moved through that conflict with varying degrees of skill and The majority of the joy and pain we experience in our lives likely involves another person--it involves a relationship. Whether it be a friendship, a romantic partnership, or a business endeavor, relationships with other people will determine a large portion of what we experience emotionally in our daily lives.

We have all had at least one relationship that confounded us in some way. Maybe we were confounded by our own choices in the relationship. Maybe we were confounded by the other person’s choices in the relationship. Maybe we look back on it and wonder why the heck we were ever in it or how the heck we got into it in the first place.

“If I knew then what I knew now …”, etc.

And maybe it is more than one relationship. Maybe there is a pattern you've noticed and you feel trapped by. And maybe the conflict you have had lead to less than inspiring results. Predictably.

And dating. Ah ... dating. It's more often than not like rolling the dice, isn't it? And we all know how gambling goes: the house almost always wins.

Whether we are in an unfulfilling relationship, want to be in a relationship or are looking to enhance and enrich a wonderful relationship we are already in, there is no way to avoid examining our human relating and the humanity of our relating. And a lot of it is messy. Some if it seems like simple chance and luck. Some of it can be confusing. Some of it is frustrating.

But it does not have to be that way.

What if you could approach a new relationship and/or maintaining your current relationship with far greater wisdom?

Can we learn wisdom the easy way?

Yes. We can.

What you can expect to discover in this evening workshop:

•How to rapidly determine is someone is a fit for you beyond the immediate “chemistry”
•How to use conflict to increase intimacy and understanding--and co-create compelling futures
•Discover a framework to evolve a relationship you are in. Like, no kidding.
•Discover the deeper values being expressed by upset (and also by joy) and how to use them to act with impressive wisdom and insight

And stop hearing yourself say things like this:

• “Relationships are supposed to be hard/require work.”
• “Why do I keep choosing the wrong person/the wrong kind of man/woman?”
• “We say we want the same things, but …”
• “We must have some past karma we're working out ...”


What: Evolutionary Relationships: From Chance to Wisdom | From Conflict to Connection
When: Tuesday, September 10th @ 7:15pm
Where: San Francisco
Cost: Free

Why: To predicably increase your levels of Joy and fulfillment in your relationships


»RSVP« for exact location by using the contact form on this site.

That resolution you could not keep. That diet you failed to stay on. That habit you could not break. That part of you that you don't want to own ... and perhaps even deny. That behavior you want--or even need--to stop but can't seem to. Or maybe for you it is that person you know you should stay away from but keep going back to.

Including those parts you have been encouraged to label "shadow".

Your fractured self.

Those parts. Those parts of yourself you are frustrated with, argue or struggle with, and at times, perhaps even hate. Those parts can be brought into alignment, reclaimed, and dissolved into the greater whole.

And rather than the internal dissonance you experience--that internal tension and conflict--you can and will experience greater and greater levels of alignment, integration, and harmony--to your very core.

I look forward to showing you how on Tuesday night. Details »HERE«.

Conflicts arise. For some of us, they arise more frequently than others. 

We all know this.

Conflicts can arise in our personal lives and in our relationships with other people. They can and do arise in professional contexts. And yes, they can even arise within ourselves.

In our personal lives, they can wreak havoc in romantic situations producing a lack of harmony and robbing us of the joy we expect those relationships to provide. In our professional lives they can corrupt professional associations or derail business deals affecting our financial outlook. When they occur within our selves, they can lead to inner turmoil, when we would rather experience harmony and peace.

This isn't exactly news.

What many of us fail to realize is that regardless of the context or the parties involved, we can use the same simple yet effective communication strategies to not only resolve the conflicts and problems, but to use them as a gateway to increased intimacy and connection, broader and deeper understanding, and ultimately, a positive outcome in virtually any situation--personal, professional, or individual.

With the tools we will cover in this mini-workshop, you will discover, gain, or acquire the tools that will allow you to:

• Find common ground where most are resigned to discord
• Expand the number of perspectives through which you can view yourself, others, and situations in general
• Navigate the delicate and often tricky waters of conflicts in romantic situations
• Negotiate professional agreements more effectively
• Overcome obstacles to an outcome that honor all parties involved
• Validate the other person/parties while still honoring yourself
• Create conversations that transcend the "problem" and communicate directly at the level of values
• Speak to the underlying message, rather then the superficial complaint being presented to you
• Dissolve internal conflicts within yourself where you are "of two minds" about something or feel "torn" between this and that perspective or desire

Decrease conflict and discord in your life. Increase joy, connection, intimacy, and success.

Start by adding the tools we will offer in this free evening workshop:

What: From Conflict to Connection
Where: San Francisco »RSVP« for exact location
When: Tuesday, March 12th, 2013 @ 7:15pm

Cost: Free.
Value: Huge

»RSVP« for exact location