Evolutionary Blog

Why NOT to Use "Hypnotic Sales" Techniques:

Often I get asked to teach someone "hypnotic sales" or some variation; anchoring, state association, etc. The idea is that if you associate someone into a positive state, then anchor yourself to that for them, this will be an effective sales technique--even if it has nearly nothing to do with your offering or the functional fit between your prospective client, and their needs with your services.

There are other ideas and approaches about this, but I am going to give just that one example. They are all of that flavor.

These techniques are thought to be very powerful, and some of the most effective techniques available. Which is partly true. They may be in the very short-term sense. They are also a nightmare strategically, in the long-term sense. Not only do I advise against it, I categorically consider them unethical in most situations.

If a prospective client cannot remember how they arrived at the decision to work with you [and as a good measure, if you can not easily remind them in writing over an email] then you are going to have blowback at some point in the future.

"Buyer's remorse" does not quite cover it.

So not only do I have people agree that they will only use the tools of influence that I do teach in service of someone else's outcomes [not their own], but I also advise against and refuse to teach hypnosis or anchoring in the context of sales and influence in the Evolutionary Sales process. It is anathema to all that Evolutionary Sales is. If you are always coming from the place of using tools of influence ONLY to assist another in achieving their outcomes, it is virtually guaranteed you
 be selling ethically.

Now there are trainers and entertainers and presenters and "edutainers" who not only use the hypnotic sales techniques, but teach it, brag about it, and sell products to do the very things I mentioned above as unethical in my not-so-humble opinion. I have also dealt with enough of their customers post-fact that I can say the resentments and shattered hopes as a result of that strategy is frustrating to watch and painful to behold, empathetically.

On the one hand, given the volume that people like Christopher Howard and Tony Robbins produce in terms of attendees, it is hard not to be grateful for what they are doing in the world in exposing people to rapid transformation. And to be honest, I am not sure how you could do it any other way in terms of sales with a crowd that large.

While hypnotic sales may be effective and the only viable solution in a large crowd [I question that, but it is efficient for short-term-monetary gain]; it is a toxic approach for those of us in solo-businesses as practitioners. 

There is a better way, where all sides are more effectively served. 

 What I do know is that if you are opening a relationship [rather than "closing deals"] You must engage the prospect in inquiry, mostly to be certain you can be of service. Once that is assured, direct them to consider if they did have the solution they seek what it would open up in their lives and then if you are certain you are a fit for their needs and they are a fit for you, then you can ethically open the relationship.

This is the process we teach in the Coaching the Life Coach Apprentice Program. This is the approach that assures conversion rates of over 95% AND what I call a "stick rate". In other words--no relationship fall off from buyer's remorse.

At the upcoming event I am not only going to teach this entire ethical sales process for free, but I will give you all the nuts and bolts you need to have high conversion rates in your introductory sessions.

Every nut and bolt I know how to deliver to you. In service of you having sustainability of finances, your clients having sustainability of change, so we can all create a better world together as we accelerate the Evolution of Consciousness.

Join us. RSVP now to reserve your spot

One of the main challenges that small business people face—particularly solo practitioners or “solo-preneurs” in general--is the problem and the art of motivating oneself.

You are your own boss. If you have employees, then the game may be a little different for you as you have people depending on you.  However, if it is just you, there are often no external forces telling you that you must do any particular “thing”.  There are certainly exceptions to this—client deliverables, purchases that have been made, the general inertia of your business pulling you along at some point, but really, especially at first, it is an uphill battle for many on their own.

There are so many aspects to this problem of motivation that some never figure it out—or worse, they find solutions that compound the problem in the long-term because the “solutions” are ill-suited approaches. Ill-suited to them as individuals.

To really add fuel to the fire [or baking soda to the lack thereof] we have distractions, overwhelm, time management, prioritization, and the list goes on, and on, and on.

What works for one person in terms of motivation may or may not—and often does not—work for another. So it is with time management, goals, and the like. There is no one-size-fits-all or even a one-size-fits-most solution. Particularly for those who are more sensitive both emotionally and kinesthetically/energetically, many of the “take massive action” or “get present to the consequences if you do not” approaches create more internal dissonance, and if the tasks or milestones the individual is accountable for are not accomplished, this can lead to a build-up of that same internal dissonance, or worse, feelings of guilt or worse still, even shame, and with the principle of compound interest on the “debt” you have with yourself…well, we can see where it may and often does lead: overwhelm rather than accomplishment.

Even if it does not lead there for you, these levels of intense urgent styles of motivational techniques can cause a lack of balance at best, and at worst, hardcore burnout.

What is the solution? Custom design your own motivational strategy using a few basic principles and approaches.

Step 1: Discover Your Style

Find out what works for you at a base level. Since at least Aristotle was writing in the  300s B.C. we have known that humans are generally motivated in two basic ways or “directions” ::: away from pain or toward pleasure. Or both.

Stated in the context of goals and deliverables: away from consequences or toward a vision.

You will notice one creates leverage [and often contraction and internal dissonance] in your body—it pushes you. Compels you. Often uncomfortably. The other pulls you forward. It is expansive. It opens you and draws you toward it.

The danger is to judge one or the other. Urgency/away from/consequence driven motivation could be “bad” because it creates tension and dissonance. Vision is “good” because it is expansive. Or the reverse; vision/toward is “bad” because it does not create massive intense action, necessarily. Urgency/away from is “good” because it creates more instant [in some] results.

An additional component is style is how you like to be supported. 

This is also a critical component. While I am not an "accountability coach" per se, and never have been, quite often, clients ask me to support them in getting stuff done. Before I even begin such an aspect of our relationship, and since I can assume almost any style of coaching to serve them at this point, I ask them ::: how do you like to be supported.

No this before asking for external help--or be prepared to explore that inquiry with your friend, guide, coach, or accountability partner.

The truth is, whichever style works for you, as you become more aware, even now, at how you have created results in the past for yourself—when you found yourself simply motivated to accomplish what you wanted to accomplish—is the “good” style for you.

If an “away from” strategy works best for you, then create externally supported consequences to propel you forward. Engage a coach professionally, who coaches in that style. Or have a friend be your accountability partner—and someone willing to enforce uncomfortable consequences for/on you.

If this kind of approach has you feel overwhelmed, or has you feel like running from your entire support system [missing phone calls, not emailing them when you said you would, unaccomplished tasks building up, etc.], then consider the other approach: an approach that has you moving toward a larger vision. Toward a future you are creating. An approach that has you stay constantly present to the deeper meaning in the work you are doing; what your purpose of mission is, so you stay in the game. Plainly put ::: remember why you are committed to doing what you are supposed to do, in the grand scheme of things.  

As an example: you’re not simply “having a client session”. You are doing far more than that—you are helping someone have the life they have always dreamed of. And even greater or larger, you are contributing to the evolution of humanity itself—to a global vision of the Greater Good.

When:  Wednesday, July 16th @ 6:30pm Pacific
Where: Online Webinar. »Register Here« 

Cost: Yep, it's free
What and Why:

The Mythology of Self-Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a huge focus of pop-psychology and in the world and business of personal development. We devote time to workshops, read books, self-examine, consider it part of our necessary shadow-work perhaps, and yet still we are often left confounded by behaviors that seem to undermine our greatest aspirations for ourselves and our highest vision or our life.

We set a goal, or declare some new way of behaving or declare an end to some way we have been behaving and how long does it take to break our "promise"? Anyone who has ever tried to stop an old habit or start a new habit has experienced this--be it the smoke from a cigarette, a fatty or sugary food we should not eat, or the affections from someone we know to be as toxic for us as deeply inhaling cigarette smoke. Or, how about starting to go to the gym? Or maybe it was some New Year's resolution that you resigned from after about a week.

Or ... maybe it was saying you would not yell at people in traffic any more. Or engage with more compassion and empathy. Until that one person who ...

Or maybe it was something bigger with more at stake: a new high-paying position, a new career path, or finishing that book you've always said you were going to write, and yet your behaviors did not occur in alignment with the simple and clear steps you know – consciously -- it will take to accomplish the thing you said you would (or wanted to) accomplish (or be, do, or have.)

So most of us have begun to reduce this to some inner-enemy--some saboteur running around and setting charges on our bridges, and undermining the soiled path we are trying to walk on, having us stumble into those pitfalls.

You know: that part of you that you have probably cursed in your mind, under your breath, or even out loud in frustration.

The idea of an inner enemy is one way of relating to this phenomenon—and it is a valid and generally accepted way of relating to it. But is it an effective way of relating to it? Is it really true? Does labeling it in such a manner give us access to resolving the problem?

Most of us are aware that how we relate to something in our awareness will produce specific and predicable results both mentally and emotionally. And will even shift our "reality". The power of positive thinking and the Law of Attraction are both commonly accepted in personal development communities and among individuals interested in developing themselves. Yet these concepts are often misunderstood, misused – and underused.

Our thoughts do not create reality, because we do not experience reality directly—we experience it through perceptual filters and we interpret—and then we generalize those interpretations making meaning or creating beliefs. However our thoughts certainly create our reality--how we interpret reality will lead to our experience of reality. Objective and subjective; exterior and interior. That is to say, how we interpret what is happening "out there" will create our experience of reality "in here" and it certainly creates our immediate emotional experience and what we make that mean through generalizations and the creations of beliefs about the world, ourselves, people, etc., leads to what I like to call our "emotional atmosphere".

How is this most often done? In language; in our linguistic structures--descriptors and labels.

In this way, while our thoughts do not create "reality" with a capital R, it does--absolutely--create our experience of reality.

As clarifying example, most of us know that we can relate to the same event in one of two ways: as a "crisis" or as an "opportunity". We know that doing so will create different solutions as we will approach it differently.

Circling back to this idea of an "inner enemy", what results does that labeling of this phenomenon predictably produce? It creates a "me vs the other", us against "it" or "them" mentality which leads to tension and separation which in turn produces even greater internal dissonance.

The best thing about this way of relating to the phenomenon is this: it is not true; we made it up. The reason that is the good news is that given we made it up, we can create another way of relating to this phenomenon that is useful; a way that gives us access to resolving the confounding behavior that keeps us from attaining the heights we desire with the velocity and ease we wish for?

The answer is incredibly simple and elegant—both in the mathematical sense as well as the aesthetic. The process for resolution of this phenomenon involves getting into communication and into relationship with those parts of us that are out of alignment, find out what their positive purpose is, take that up to the highest/deepest level and integrate it from that place. It can be a fairly profound experience that is deeply healing, and allows you to create greater and greater levels of inner harmony within your Self.

Simple? Yes. Easy? Well, that depends on the skill of the Guide. That last paragraph above encapsulates and summarizes a process that can take between 20 and 40 minutes, depending on the depth of the problem, but it is virtually always successful at realigning that part of you that is ... well, out of alignment.

Take your "inner-enemies" and turn them into your most powerful allies.

Find out on Wednesday, July 16th @ 6:30pm Pacific
Where: Online Webinar. »Register Here« 

That time of year has just passed when most of us have taken inventory. And many of us imagine a future that is somehow ... different from the past.

Sometimes it comes in the form of examining what we learned from the year we have just lived and experienced--and making plans for what we want to accomplish in the coming year.

Either way, we all know how it goes for most of us by the end of January. Or, heck, by January 10th. Have you already broken a "resolution"?

This is not some failure on our part; more often it is a matter of conflicting parts within us that are yearning to be understood, appreciated, and integrated. Still other aspects can simply be not being present to our internal representations and not understanding our unconscious organization of time and how to access that and maximize its power.

Essentially not understanding how to harness the power of our own mind.

And sometimes it is not knowing how to language a goal to make certain that the probabilities that it will become a reality are dramatically increased.

We'll cover all of that in this free evening event.

What you will discover:

• How to create S.M.A.R.T. goals and outcomes
• Why resolutions rarely ever work--and how to make sure they do
• Understanding your unconscious organization of time
• How unconscious, internal conflicting parts can be brought into your awareness, honored, and integrated

• The art and science of Time Line Seeding to create spooky cool results

Join us. It's free. 

You have everything to gain and nothing to lose by being exposed to this powerful way to manage your own mind.

Your future begins now ...

What: Creating Your SMART Future
When: Tuesday, January 7th @ 7:15pm Pacific
Where: 2nd and Bryant in San Francisco  »» RSVP ««

Update:

If you missed the evening, or if you were there but want a refresher, here is a video summary of the material for you that includes me guiding you through the process of creating your future.

In Service,

Jason

Viewing it on an iPad? Your video is »here« .

The video below is for the rest of us.

All of our parents were doing the best they could with the resources they had available to them at the time--and regardless of their intentions, everyone could always use more resources.

What happens in our formative years, is that patterns our parents exhibited imprinted themselves onto us as children, and later, come out in various ways as we live our adult lives. Their behaviors in relationships, their beliefs about money, about the world, about spirituality—and yes, about ourselves -- about all of life, really.

All the things they said to us that were less than empowering …

They all all made an impression on us and in many ways have us be less than fully free. Their patterns wrapped around us, clothing us in perceptions. Most people live – to varying degrees – either in perpetuation of, or in reaction against, their parents’ patterns.

We’ve all heard someone – and perhaps even ourselves – say “I’ll never be like them” or “I’ll never do that (to my kids)”. And even if you had the most wonderful parents in the world, who only loved and supported you with kindness, empathy, compassion, and clarity – there are still quirks we picked up we may be better off without – or certainly better off having choice around.

And then there are those of us who, deeply into our adult lives, are still laboring to please our parents – some of whom are not even alive anymore!

Isn’t that funny?

How do we slough off that skin shedding it to reveal our more authentic selves? How do we free ourselves from the patterns that bind?

We do it through a process called Parental Re-Imprinting.

Parental Re-imprinting is a deep and profound process I have guided hundreds of clients through – and I myself have experienced several times with my own parental history – that leaves us freer, with a greater degree of compassion and understanding—especially for our parents. Free from the patterns our parents surrounded us with.

Wherever you are on the spectrum –whether you had a traumatic and abusive childhood, or on the other end, if your parents were absolutely fantastic yet had some limitations you picked up unconsciously – or if you are still trying to please them—living your life for them, rather than you, then this process and evening will hold tremendous value for you.

These parental patterns can determine your level of happiness and success in relationships, your capacities to earn the level of money you desire, your level of self-acceptance and happiness and up to and including your overall outlook on life.

Free yourself from the patterns that bind you consciously--and unconsciously – start by joining us.

Oh -- and it's free.

When:  Tuesday, December 3rd @ 7:00pm
Where: 404 Bryant Street San Francisco CA 94107

What: Parental Re-Imprinting explained and demonstrated
Why: To free yourself 

»RSVP« to reserve your spot.